I’m an emotionally battered mum. Let me explain myself a bit better. You know when you hear of those unfortunate people who are in a really awful, manipulative, emotionally abusive adult relationship, yet are so emotionally attached to their partner? Well that is me and my two year old- Princess 2. Lets be clear-I’m the victim here (and lets be even clearer here, there is no physical abuse).
My two year old is emotionally exhausting, demanding, manipulative and headstrong. The sheer exhaustion of it all has reduced me to tears on more than one occasion. Before you say it, no this is not depression. I think this is more common than people care to say. Parenthood can be emotionally and physically exhausting. Yet signs of struggling can feel like weakness and failure to some, and so many parents choose to suffer internally.
It is important to me that my two year old and I have a good relationship and that she is a well rounded individual. So for the benefit of both of us, she started preschool today.
There were no tears from either of us. She ran off to play with her newly formed friends and I had to chase her down for kiss. I promised to return later, we said our goodbyes and I left. Both of us happy.
Princess 2 is my third child. I have been a mum for 16 years. In my experience from socialising with mums in many different circles over these past years, I have found that there is a tendency to judge a parent’s parenting success based on their child’s behaviour. My first two children were very easy to parent and very well behaved. In fact other people would comment on how placid and well behaved they were.
Princess 2 is not like my other two children. She is the one that you see throwing a tantrum on the floor in the supermarket or having a melt down because it is time to go home from the park, or you might hear her saying ‘no’ repeatedly when I ask her to do something. I think that parents can be way too critical and way too quick to judge and I think that rather than criticising and smirking or raising eyebrows (yes Iv seen it), we need to be supportive of one another. After all, if you are just starting off with your first child, who knows what YOUR next child might be like 😉